Saturday Afternoon Fever

An email I sent to the the author of Saturday Afternoon Fever, Matthew Hardy. It is a book about growing up in Melbourne and following your footy team. Some of you will have absolutely no idea of what I am talking about. Some of you will.
-------------------------

G’day there,

I hope my efforts don’t go to waste and someone reads this. Ideally this should be Mr Hardy but feel free to read on even if you aren’t him. Oh, and if you aren’t him can you pls forward it to him afterwards?

Obviously I am not the first [and I am unlikely to be the last] to comment on your book which I have just completed. I only bought it a couple of weeks ago when visiting that AFL Mecca, Sydney! Living in New Zealand for the last 8 years I am somewhat removed from the daily goings on in AFL land even though we are only a 3 ½ hour flight away. Other than a weekly highlights show on Sky TV I feel somewhat aligned to your situation in London. Prime TV couldn’t even get excited about buying the rights to the Friday Night Football to replay on a Saturday morning. Instead we get some crappy rerun of movies from the sixties. At least the internet brings me opportunities to listen to and read about footy.

I am a passionate Collingwood supporter and when growing up I always wondered why some of my mates followed the likes of St Kilda and Footscray. Conversely, they couldn’t understand why someone with a good upbringing could follow the Pies. To this day a good mate of mine, Tim, follows the Saints as passionately as he did when younger. [By the way, in a number of long distance calls he often asks if I had heard of you and mentioned how funny you were and that I should tune in to SEN.] His family is not unlike yours to an extent; him and his elder brother experiencing the misguided [!] fortunes of the Saints over the years. Having come to some conclusions and epiphanies the majority of hardcore footy fans are no different other than the colours they choose to adorn on a weekend. [I exclude wannabe ‘rabid’ fans from this as per my rant below.]

Thank you for a great read. Whilst I found it to offer a multitude of opportunities to laugh out loud I can safely say it was not the funniest book I have ever read [as claimed by G. Lyon. I am not sure how many funny books he has read but I don’t reckon he has read ‘Around Ireland with a Fridge’ by Tony Hawkes. That is a gem.]

I had all the footy cards. I even had multiple Alle de Woldes but heaven knows where they are now. Should I have sufferings of guilt that I may have deprived you? Like other readers’ comments I had many similar experiences to yours but only a black and white version; many a day spent at Victoria Park.

I remember meeting Rene Kink at Prahran MacDonalds, meeting Dermie at a school clinic and copping abuse from Russell Greene in history classes especially when the Pies beat any team he was in. My own glorious career came to an end when I was wrapped around a goal post in an inter-house game in Year 10. I chose to pursue hockey after that, a much safer sport.

I, like you, have had to adjust to an ever-changing football world. My partner and I flew to Sydney recently to watch the Pies at Telstra Stadium. When we went to purchase tickets I was blown away by the $68.00 asking price for a premium seat. Sure if it was a final but for a home and away it was nonsensical especially when I could get the aisle next to the premium area for $29.00. Call me cheap. I call it being fiscally prudent. But then again I had already spent a few dollars on airfares and accommodation.

While at the Homebush Bay Brewery Bar I met some so called ‘lifelong Sydney supporters’. Geez, they [The AFL and Sydneysiders] have a long way to go in the harbour city. I asked them how long they had followed the Swans and in their best broken English replied that it had been since the Swans came to Sydney. I then asked if they had followed Sth Melbourne [the accent should’ve given it away] and they replied ‘who?’ Then when I got to my seat I saw a number with ethnic backgrounds eating roti and the like and cheering any time the Swans marked the ball. Like a football in the face, the realisation hit me - the face of football has changed forever.

I still have my old footy jumper with the VFL logo. My scarf still has the VFL logo. I even have a footy jumper [bought in 1999] that has the actual sponsor’s logo sewn onto it. I see the modern day version is just an imprint. Maybe I need to move with the times but there is nothing wrong with being a romantic. Your book certainly reignited the memories. I have converted my partner [a Samoan Kiwi] to following the Pies. I regularly attend the rugby here but it has nothing on Aussie Rules, the excitement, the fan fare. I will urge her to read the book and Steve Streven’s Keeping the Faith so she can understand more about how I grew up and what footy means to so many Melburnians. [On a side note, is it only the ignorant and/or Sydneysiders that refer to those from Melbourne as Melbournites? I had never heard that reference before.]

Hope you’re still with me on this [and thank you if you are!] but one last thing. I read in that round’s AFL Record [Round 13] about Rebecca Wilson being a rabid Swans fan. If watching people eat roti wasn’t bad enough I had a read of Rebecca’s article. I was so incensed I wrote to Michael Lovett about it. He has probably treated my email with contempt and that the ravings of a madman. You are probably agreeing as you read.

In terms of being a rabid fan, I ask you how the following earns you the right to consider yourself rabid:

Firstly, how does one change from following Carlton to Sydney? [Only a woman who changes her mind.]

Secondly, wearing a Swans scarf and a bit of red in her outfit. [At least she knows what colours they wear.]

Thirdly, choosing not to follow the team to watch a game interstate early in the season but then deciding if they are a chance to make the finals she will do so. [Perhaps she should read about your episode on the train.]

In closing, I must mention that I am thankful I have been able to witness a premiership unlike many of my mates. I tend not to acknowledge Essendon or Carlton fans and their teams’ achievements. And also, I really should take Steve Streven’s lead and write a book about the Pies. I figure that with a fan base of supposedly half a million surely there must be money to be made.